Dream Cast:
Ann: Nelia Miller Cassandra: Maya Rudolph ANN walks is waiting for her medicine at the Pharmacy inside of SAFEWAY. She has a BASKET of GROCERIES. CASSANDRA is pacing back and forth, anxious. A BROWN PAPER BAG falls out of her BASKET, revealing an unopened PREGNANCY TEST. Ann: (picks it up) Here you go! Cassandra: Oh thank you, so sorry about that. Ann: So! …you expecting a little person? Cassandra: (uncomfortable) Uh…I don’t-- Ann: No like, I mean a baby, not a little-little person. Cassandra: I understood you…but um, no unfortunately. Ann: Shoot I’m sorry, I just saw that fall out of your bag. I should really mind my own business. Cassandra: Oh it’s fine! You’re actually making me less anxious. I’ve been waiting here so long, pacing back and forth I forgot how to breathe. Ann: Wow, what are you waiting for? Cassandra: Hormone medicine. I can’t have babies… Ann: (feels bad, tries to recover) Ah, well I can’t afford life… They share a laugh. Cassandra: Sometimes I wish everyone could just get what they want. Ann: I hear you, sister. Cassandra: But I guess nothing in life comes that easy… Ann: HA! It would be so effing great to have $10,000 right now. Cassandra: It would be so effing great to have a baby right now! Cassandra drops her basket, which causes her CARTON OF EGGS to break. Without hesitation Ann grabs her eggs and hands it over to Cassandra. Ann: Here I don’t mind giving you my eggs. End of Play
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Dream Cast
John: Adam Dlugolecki Laura: Aubrey Plaza A man, JOHN, stares blankly at his computer. He seems distant, sad. His eyes are puffy. He sneezes. With some hesitation he pulls out a bottle of BENADRYL from his desk drawer. He opens it. John: This is it. Drinks about three quarters of the bottle. Feels like throwing up but holds it in. Waits restlessly for the next minute. John: Hey Laura! LAURA rolls in on her CHAIR from another desk. Laura: Yo whattup? John: Can you OD from Benadryl? Laura: Yeah, you can OD from anything. Why? John: Nothing… Laura: (sees bottle) Holy shit what did you do? John: I’m just-- Laura: Oh my God! John you can’t just kill yourself in public. John: Well gee, I’m pretty fucking tired of doing the same shit. I want a better job. Laura: Yeah well who doesn’t want a better job? But at least I’m not trying to kill myself off of Benadryl. John: Whatever Laura, I’m not even dead. Laura: Not yet! Dude you have to throw up. John: No! Laura: Well why not? John: I feel better, it made my allergies go away. (beat) Shit. End of Play. Scene rises on NATASHA RUDOLPH sitting on a stool CS.
She is holding a PEN and PAPER while writing and talking simultaneously. A series of projections play in the back showing the scene she’s about to describe. The series of actions between a man and woman show only body parts, no faces. This isn’t exactly just theatre, it’s meta, get over it. Natasha: I’m in a room. It’s dark. One spotlight shining right at me, so I can’t see anything but bright white light. I’m scared because I don’t know where I am. Where are you? I’m scared of a monster attacking me with his great strength and taking me down. I’m scared of the unknown, I’m scared of being lonely, I’m scared of missing someone I love. Where are you, Sam? No matter what I do, no matter where I am, no matter what dangers I face, all I can think about is you, just you, nobody else but you. She remains seated. Natasha starts observing her hands. Look at my hands. Have you ever just looked at yours? The tiny hairs sprouting up; my nails. My hands are rough. It’s not smooth or soft, like how I imagined yours to be…tender, warm. Would you like the roughness of my hands? I feel ashamed of them, but I still want you to come. I’m scared the time’s running out. What if I leave and never see you again? What if we both leave and you forget me? A flash of light and a change of scenery on the projection show, on screen, that she is lying on a large bed. The stage is mostly dark with a bit of moonlight hitting her. I’m cold, it’s cold in here all by myself. And it’s dark…but at least the moon’s shining bright. I can see the outline of the room—it’s huge. Winds coming through the windows, I’m cold. (beat) I feel something, it’s you. You’re right here, you have your arms wrapped around me as you sleep. The scene behind her shows a man embracing a woman in bed. Happiness can’t begin to describe how I’m feeling while I lie next to you. I feel comfort, I feel at home. Man's face is revealed on the video when he spots the camera. He looks angry as he picks it up, throws it down and steps on it. End of play. This dude, Kevin, wakes up in a dark room.
He is afraid of the dark. Kevin: Ahhhhhh!!!!!!! Well it isn’t completely dark. It’s grey. He wakes up in a grey room. Kevin: Hello? Anybody here?! Can anybody hear me? Please answer, I just want to get out! (to himself) Don’t panic, Kevin, don’t panic. Just take your phone out and follow the light. Just find the door and no matter what, do not look around. No one is looking if you can’t see them. Kevin pulls out his phone and turns on the light. Kevin walks around the space. He walks in all sorts of directions. A bright light shines on him. A door is revealed. Kevin walks towards the door. Kevin: (knocks) Hello! Is anybody in there? Listen I’m just passing by…I think. I don’t know where I am and how I got here! I need help getting back to St. Louis! Please I just want to go home. I have to go home. I'm getting really thirsty and hungry. I'm feeling nauseous, so if anybody can here me. Help!!!! Kevin continues to knock when the door cracks open. He hears voices, lots of voices. He decides to enter. Kevin: Hello… Kevin walks into an endless room. He can’t see past the people surrounding him but it goes on for eternity. The lighting is extremely blinding so Kevin bumps into people as he tries to walk through the crowd. He stops and finally gets a good look. He becomes immobile when he realizes that every single girl he’s ever had a crush on was standing that room. They’re all looking at him. End of Play. A man, JIM, comes home from work. His wife, TULIP, is setting up a nice dinner for him. Jim: Hi honey. They kiss. Tulip: Hey sweetie, how was work? Jim: Oh it was fine. That stew smells good though! Tulip: I hope you like it, I tried something new! Jim: What is it? Tulip: Let’s play a game. You taste and try to take a guess what it is. Jim: (excited) Alright! Jim tastes the stew. Mmm mmm mmm! Wow, um let’s see it tastes, a bit gamey. So I don’t think it’s pork…but it could…well I do like the vegetables. Tulip: Yeah I put in some Brussels sprout and potatoes cause I knew you love them! Tulip brings in a SANDWICH and starts to eat it. Jim: Honey why are you eating a sandwich? Tulip: I was feeling like chicken for dinner. Jim: Aw, well you didn’t have to go through all this, I would’ve been fine with chicken. Tulip: That’s alright, besides I knew you’ve been dying to try something exotic. Jim: (stops) Exotic? Hmm…uh…please don’t tell me I’m eating snake. Tulip: Don’t be silly! I wouldn’t dare pick one up. Jim: You sure it’s not pork? Tulip: (smiles) Cat meat. Blackout End of play. |
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November 2021
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