Dream Cast:
    Alexa: Alexa Vellanoweth 
    Josh: Josh Peck
   Drake: Drake Bell

                                                      ALEXA is waiting for a blind date.

                                                      JOSH PECK comes in and sits at her table.

Alexa: (shocked) Oh...hey!

Josh: (nervous) Hi I'm Josh.

Alexa: I'm Alexa, nice to meet you! Wow I never thought I'd see you here.

Josh: Oh...yeah I'm just filming a movie down the street and we're on our lunch break. Got an hour to spare so I got some coffee...anyway that was a long explanation.

Alexa: (giggles) So...what movie are you shooting?

Josh: It's a documentary I'm making with my friend Blake. It's really cool behind the scenes look at child stars.

Alexa: Oh wow that's interesting! Are you documenting anyone in particular?

Josh: Well...several people but honestly I feel like we'd get shot if we wanted to get good people.

Alexa: Oh my God, like who?

Josh: Oh you know like Lindsey, Amanda....

Alexa: Oh God yeah I feel so bad for them. What happened. 

Josh: A lot...but hey, I'm sorry if this comes off really awkward but I was wondering if you'd like to go on a date with me?

Alexa: Aren't we already on a date...?

Josh: Not that I know of...

Alexa: Wait, Sam didn't set us up?

Josh: No...who's Sam?

Alexa: Sam Wasowski?

Josh: No...like I said I was coming from set.

Alexa: Oh my God well this is embarrassing.

                                                 DRAKE BELL walks in.

Josh: Drake?

Drake: Josh?

Josh: What are you doing here?

Drake: Are you Alexa?

Alexa: Yes...

Drake: Hi...Sam set us up!

                                                  End of play.

Dream Cast:
  Mara: Mara De La Rosa
  Jackie: Jackie Sheehan
 Doctor: Jude Law

                                            MARA is looking at her tongue with her
                                            CELL PHONE.

                                           Mara and her roommate, JACKIE,  are waiting inside a DOCTOR'S OFFICE.

Mara: Dude I think my tongue is fucked up.

Jackie: Remind me why you're freaking out and made me come with you to the doctor's office?

Mara: Look at it! There's tiny bumps!

Jackie: (gross) What? What happened?

Mara: Ugh Jackie this is so gross.

Jackie: Well what is it? Did you burn your tongue?

Mara: No! I don't know, I was eating something salty. 

Jackie: Well maybe your buds are just swollen.

Mara: But they've been swollen for days! Ugh I feel so gross.

Jackie: Let me see.

                                         Jackie looks at Mara's tongue. Confused.

What is it supposed to look like?

Mara: I don't know. 

                                       DOCTOR comes in.

Doctor: Hello Mara, what seems to be the problem?

Mara: My tongue...it's got tiny bumps.

                                      Doctor looks at tongue.
 
                                      Doctor laughs. 

Doctor: There's nothing wrong with your tongue. Don't worry you're not dying.

                                       End of Play.

Dream Cast:
                       Anna: Sarah Paulson
  
                                                          A woman, ANNA, stands in front of a mirror. 

Anna: Have you ever just stopped and looked at yourself?

                                                       Slowly she starts taking her clothes completely off.

I mean but really look at yourself.

It's scary isn't it?

But I mean...we have to...we have to, to get a sense of reality.

To get a sense of who we really are.

I'm using my body...for a lot of things.

My body is using me for a lot of things.

Who's right?

We gotta be brave.

I gotta be.

I dare you.

Look at every single each of your body. Every mark, every stretch, wound, dot, every cell. 

Every single part of you...

Ever been scared of who you really are?

Ever had the guts to face yourself?

                                                            Anna remains standing naked for a whole minute.
 
                                                            End of play.

            Dream Cast:
                          Justin: Justin Bieber
                         Selena: Selena Gomez

                                                 JUSTIN walks into a room where SELENA is 
                                                holding a FOLDED MAGAZINE ready to attack.

Justin: What are you doing?

Selena: Ssh! Don't move.

Justin: Why?

Selena: I've been trying to kill this fucking fly for the last 20 minutes.

Justin: Babe it's just a fly.

Selena: I said ssh!

                                              Selena sees the fly. As she starts to strike, Justin
                                              laughs at something he sees on his IPHONE.

                                              Selena misses fly.

Selena: Damn it Justin!

Justin: What? My fans are so shady.

Selena: Why are you talking about your fans right now?

Justin: I don't this one girl like really likes me. I can't help it...

Selena: Literally Justin you're getting on my last nerve. I cannot believe we have to be together right now.

Justin: Selena I've done nothing but be nice to you! 

Selena: You're right, you're nice. That was never the problem Justin. The problem was, is, that you're an idiot.

Justin: Hey I don't call you that! I've done everything you told me to do.

Selena: I told you to be quiet! I almost had the damn thing.

Justin: Bae you need to like chill out.

Selena: Shut up, Justin I'm not your bae.

Justin: Uh are you like PMS-ing?

Selena: Honestly?!

Justin: Alright, I'm sorry. Anyway your manager's wondering if you're ready for our dinner date.

Selena: Ugh yeah. 

Justin: You know what I think. I think you're over thinking it.

Selena: The fly?

Justin: Mhmm.

Selena: Well then if you're so good then why don't you kill it?

Justin: Pssht girl I got this better than Mr. Miyagi. 

                                             Justin sees the fly and without thinking 
                                             kills it with his Iphone. Iphone breaks. Fly is still alive.

Selena: Way to go Karate Kid. 

                                             End of Play.

    Dream Cast:
                Amanda: Amanda Bynes
                Hillary: Hillary Duff

                                                  AMANDA is standing alone in a waiting room. She is wearing
                                                  DENIM SHORTS and a PINK HALTER TOP. 

                                                  HILLARY walks in wearing a PANT SUIT. She seems 
                                                  ready for a business meeting. 

Amanda: Well well well if it isn't Lizzie McGuire.

Hillary: Oh my God how are you, Amanda?

Amanda: Oh you know, fine.

Hillary: Did they call you in for the audition too?

Amanda: Yeah...what are you shocked?

Hillary: (lies) No...anyway what have you been up to?

Amanda: People watching. Or rather I'm being watched...and followed, it's fucking tiring man.

Hillary: Who's following you? 

Amanda: I can't tell you.

                                          Amanda starts dancing.

Hillary: What are you doing?

Amanda: Warming up, I'm gonna get this part. 

Hillary: That's so weird.

Amanda: What is?

Hillary: That they had to called you in.

Amanda: (gets angry) Girl you don't know me! I was famous before anybody even knew who YOU were!

Hillary: Amanda I'm not here to start a fight. 

Amanda: Then mind your own goddamn business Cadet Kelly. 

Hillary: I just think it's weird that they called me in to read for Amanda...

Amanda: What?

Hillary: Yeah, aren't you here for the revival of the Amanda Show?

Amanda: This is what the audition is for?

Hillary: Yes. What did they call you in for?

Amanda: A dancing lobster...

                                         End of Play. 

             Dream Cast:
                     Mariana: Mariana Brassaroto
                     Chrystian: Chrystian Kaplan

                                       MARIANA is CHURNING BUTTER when CHRYSTIAN comes in to join her.

                                       Both are working extremely hard and are exhausted.

Mariana: I feel intense right now.

Chrystian: You feel intense right now?

Mariana: I feel intense right now.

Chrystian: You feel intense right now?

Mariana: You're making me feel uncomfortable.

Chrystian: I'm making you feel uncomfortable?

Mariana: You're making me feel uncomfortable.

Chrystian: I'm making you feel uncomfortable? 

Mariana: You're making me feel uncomfortable.

Chrystian: I feel a little bad about that.

Mariana: You feel a little bad about that.

Chrystian: I feel a little bad about that.

Mariana: You feel a little bad about that.

Chrystian: I'm tired.

Mariana: You're tired.

Chyrstian: I'm tired.

Mariana: You're tired.

Chrystian: I'm tired.

Mariana: You're tired.

                                     Lights out.

                                     End of Play.

Dream Cast:
     Denise:  Aidy Bryant
     Lisa: Vanessa Bayer
     Marina:  Cecily Strong       

                                                    DENISE walks in carrying a CARTON of ICE CREAM. 
                                                    She sits next to her best friend LISA.

                                                    The following is done over-dramatically. 

Lisa: Did you get the kind I like?

Denise: Cookie Dough--

Lisa: Yes!

                                                    Door knocks. Denise gets up and opens the door.
                                                    MARINA, a tall beautiful woman enters, she is holding 
                                                    a GROCERY BAG.

Marina: Hey girl hey!

Denise: How was your audition?

Marina: Ugh it was exhausting.

Lisa: Tell us all about it!

Denise: Yo you seem really down for having just auditioned for Vampire Diaries.

Marina: (mixed) I know I’m gonna sound so unappreciative but sometimes I feel like... being a man would be easier ya know?

Lisa: Preach.

Denise: Men can eat as much ice cream as we do and literally still look beautiful...rugged. 

Marina: And if they’re fat, it doesn’t necessarily mean they won't get booked for film or TV!

Denise: If women were fat--

Lisa: Ooh child, please. If women are fat we’d…we’d--

Denise: We wouldn’t be getting as many auditions as you've been getting, Marina.

Marina: I know I know and again I’m not bitching…but I am. It’s just that everything is so black and white out there. I just wish I was a boy.

Lisa: Yeah…it would be nice to pee standing up.

Marina: We could do so much...more…physically…

Denise: Oh what I would do for a beard.

Marina: Why do you want a beard?

Denise: So I can hide my double chin.

                                                            End of Play. 

Dream Cast:
         Sheila: Any struggling actress
         Producer: Any successful producer (must be a douche)
         Director: Any successful director (must be a douche) 
         Writer: Any successful writer (must be a douche)      
                                                    
                                                            A handful of high-level producers, directors, 
                                                            and writers are stuck in a DARK ROOM.

                                                            Sheila walks in carrying a MACHINE GUN.

                                                            Sheila shoots them all.

                                                            End of Play. 

Dream Cast:
Rudy: Any girl/boy existing today
Bud: Any boy/girl existing today

                                                             The scene rises on BUD and RUDY on opposite sides of the 
                                                             stage. They are in their own individual rooms and are 
                                                             communicating with each other via text messaging.

                                                             Each text message is said or heard out loud.

Rudy: (VO) Hey Bud!

Bud: (VO) Sup Rudy?

Rudy: Oh good he’s finally answering me.

                                                            Rudy calls Bud. He lets it ring for a bit.

Bud: (urgent, annoyed) Hello?

Rudy: Dude you finally picked up! What are you doing tonight?

Bud: Oh I’m sorry I can’t hang--

Rudy: Dude what can you possibly be doing that you can NEVER hang out?

Bud: I’m hanging out with my friend Darlene tonight…

Rudy: Jesus where’s your assistant so that I can schedule a damn appointment with you.

Bud: (thinking) I’m sorry, but I can hang out next week!

Rudy: How are you so busy?

Bud: I’m not! I’m just scheduled to meet with a bunch of friends this week!

Rudy: (sad, doubtful) Yeah well just hit me up I guess to see if we’re both free whenever you’re free.

Bud: Alright!

                                                            World freezes. Rudy unfreezes and walks USC.

Rudy: And that’s how friendships are built today!

                                                            End of Play.

                        Dream Cast:
                                 Jessica: Heather Morris
                                    Alex: Daniel Radcliffe
                                                                     JESSICA, stands awkwardly in a bar by herself.     
                                                                   She looks uncomfortable so she takes a sip of her COCKTAIL.

                                                                 ALEX, approach her but stops before he gets close. 
                                                                He takes a sip of his DRINK.

                                                               Jessica is eyeing him, even more uncomfortable
                                                               now that he’s nearby.

                                                             As Alex turns towards Jessica and tries to speak, he locks eyes 
                                                             with her, awkwardly smiles and turns away.

                                                           Jessica opens her mouth ready to say something, but can’t, 
                                                          which builds up her frustration.

                                                         Alex practices his hand shake off to the side, while Jessica
                                                       walks towards him.

                                                      She’s too scared, she walks back.

                                                  Alex gets an idea on how to gather the nerve, so he pulls
                                                 out a bunch of BUSINESS CARDS out of his pocket.

                                               He grabs one and as he turns around to walk back to her, 
                                              he finds Jessica standing in front of him, holder her own 
                                             business cards.

                                           The two smile….STILL too say and awkward to say anything, so
                                           Jessica runs to the back of the bar.

                                        Alex steps outside the bar and pulls out his IPHONE to make a phone call.

Alex: I tried talking to her man…

It went well I think!

Yeah I don’t think I’ve ever gotten that far with a woman before.

Yeah man, you know I got game.

                                                            End of Play